found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Randomize
