well you can't waste a boner
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize