We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
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She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
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We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
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