It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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