Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
