So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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