i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
