She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
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I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
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Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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