Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
