just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize