I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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