Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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