worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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