The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
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If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
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Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier