oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
