Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
