please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Someone shit on the floor
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Randomize
