My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
i out mim tonsoeep
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
