It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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