This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
As shirtless as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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