so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
