I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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