Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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