i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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