i just wanna soil my oats bro
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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