Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
