it wasn't lemon gatorade
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...