and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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