Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
