6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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