I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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