i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize