Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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