HIV tests are more positive than that guy
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
