You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
