i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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