dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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