when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
