I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
