That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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