Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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