She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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