omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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