I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
a search helicopter?!
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
