D3 body, D1 cock
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
