i used baking grease as lip gloss
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize