her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
