dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize