I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
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