found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
